Help me, I’m poor: A broke bloke’s guide to investing (using ChatGPT, duh)
Sick of seeing investing advice that only makes sense if you're already a billionaire? Does the world of investing feel like trying to do your taxes while blindfolded underwater?
Dude, same.
It’s no surprise that folks making an average salary also want to retire, not just survive. The good news? AI can help you get your financial house in order - and a trust fund is no longer a prerequisite 🥳🎉
🏛️ Step 1: Ask ChatGPT where to start
First, you want to learn the basics—like what a stock even is, how mutual funds differ from ETFs, and why everyone keeps yelling about compound interest.
Prompt suggestions:
"Can you explain investing to me like I'm five years old?"
"What’s the difference between stocks, ETFs, and mutual funds?"
"How does compound interest work, and why should I care?"
"Give me a basic investing glossary for beginners."
🗓️ Step 2: How much could I invest per month?
The good news: You don’t need to be rich to start investing. The better news: ChatGPT can help you figure out how much to invest without sacrificing groceries.
Prompt suggestions:
"If I make $65,000 a year and my rent is $1,400, how much could I invest each month?"
"Can you help me build a basic monthly budget that includes savings and investing?"
"What percentage of my income should go to investing if I want to retire at 63?"
🧱 Step 3: Where should I open an account?
ChatGPT won’t recommend specific companies (obviously), but it can walk you through your options like a personal finance guru.
Prompt suggestions:
"What are the best types of investment platforms for beginners?"
"Explain the difference between a Roth IRA, traditional IRA, and a brokerage account."
"What should I know before signing up for a financial investment website?"
🌬️ Step 4: What should I actually invest in?
Okay, so you’ve got a budget and a brokerage account. Now what? This is where ChatGPT can help you understand risk levels, diversification, and safe-ish investing.
Prompt suggestions:
"What are some low-risk investment options for a first-time investor?"
"Help me understand index funds and why people say they’re safer."
"What does it mean to diversify your portfolio? Give me an example."
"How do I avoid losing all my money when the stock market drops?"
📊 Step 5: Project your future riches (or at least some growth)
ChatGPT can help you run some simple investment simulations so you can get a feel for how your money might grow.
Prompt suggestions:
"If I invest $300 per month starting at age 30, how much could I have by age 60 assuming 7% annual return?"
"Compare a Roth IRA and a 401(k) over 30 years with a $200 monthly contribution."
"What’s the difference between investing early vs. late when it comes to compound interest?"
💸 Final thoughts: Your wallet deserves better (and so do you)
Investing isn’t just for Wall Street suits, crypto bros, or people with six-figure salaries and a spare yacht. It’s for you—the normal human making just your Average Joe income who’d like to stop living paycheck-to-paycheck and maybe, just maybe, retire before hell freezes over.
And now? You’ve got ChatGPT. It’s like a financial advisor who can explain the basics, help you make a plan, and give you the confidence to actually get started—even if you’re only investing $50 a month.
So go ahead. Be the main character in your money story. Start small. Stay curious. And let your broke-bloke era be the beginning of something a lot richer.
